WISE FATHER

When we or someone we love comes under fire or is attacked, how do we respond?  In the world we live in today, attacks can come is numerous ways.  Following is a story about a Dad who responded to an attack on his daughter in a most remarkable way.

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By Viviane Vo-Duc, Deseret News

When an anonymous cyberbully attacked Adam Vail's daughter, he admits he was angry.
But he decided to respond in a different way — with kindness.
Sunday night, Vail’s 15-year-old daughter, Taylor Vail, received a nasty message on Twitter.
“She had received a tweet from someone who doesn’t use their name or their picture,” he said. “I don’t remember the exact tweet, something along the lines of: 'There’s this girl in school that no one likes. She’s really annoying,' and tagged my daughter in it and hashtagged some offensive things.”
Taylor admitted that the tweet upset her, but she decided not to let it get to her.
“Usually, when people say stuff like that, it’s because they want to feel better,” she said. “They just need that love in their life.”
But the next day, she got another tweet that said something like: “Not only is she tall and skinny, no body shape. Another hashtag that was offensive,” her father said.
That tweet, he said, really hit her hard. As a parent, Vail's first emotion and first reaction was anger.
“You want to do something,” he said. “You want to take matters into your own hands.”
He has a Twitter account and thought about tweeting something back to the cyberbully. “But then I realized the only way to really fight negativity is with positivity,” he said.
Vail, who works at Utah State University, emailed friends and co-workers telling them what happened to his daughter. He never told them what account the tweets came from because he didn’t want any backlash toward the bully or to have anyone say anything rude to her or him.
He told his friends he didn’t care about the bully, but he was concerned about how his daughter was feeling. He asked them to tweet positive and kind things to his daughter and to use the hashtags #TaylorVail and #bepositive.
“Whether you know her or not, what will matter is what kind of an impact this will have on her when we blow up her Twitter account with positive and kind things,” he told his friends.
People quickly started tweeting his daughter. He knew many of the people, but there were tweets from many more people whom he doesn't know. Within two hours, she received about 56 tweets.
Taylor, a volleyball player for Logan High School, was on her way to a game when the tweets started popping up.
“All of a sudden my phone kept vibrating,” she said. “I was like, ‘Oh goodness, what is going on?’”
She looked at her phone and saw the first tweet, which came from one of her dad’s friends.
“Then when I come back from my game, my phone just kind of like blew up with tweets. And all the love that I got from people — people I didn’t even know — it was amazing.”
“I was so overwhelmed,” she added. “I broke down and started crying. I felt so loved.”
Vail said it’s amazing what a small action, such as sending a kind tweet, can do and how far it can go. His plan worked, he said. His daughter has a smile on her face and has a positive attitude.
"When she got home last night, she probably came home at about 8 or 8:30, and she was beaming," he said Wednesday. "She was completely happy, and every time a new tweet came in, she was like, 'Check this one out!'"
She has since received more than 100 tweets and they are still coming in.
Seeing the extreme kindness people showed toward his daughter brought a tear to Vail's eye.
Bullies, Taylor said, are just people who want to be loved and noticed.
"The amount of love I’ve been shown, and people keep showing me, it’s amazing," she said, getting very emotional. "It just feels so good, and I really wish that girl who said those things about me can feel that love, too. I really just want her to feel it like I have."
If she ever learns who sent her the mean tweets, Taylor said she plans to thank them.
“She made me feel better about myself, even though that wasn’t her goal,” she said. “She made me feel so loved. I would want to show it back to her.”
Contributing: Peter Samore, Alex Cabrero
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Wow.  I am so impressed by this dad and the response from his circle of friends and others who love this young lady or who chose to take a stand against the cyberbullying.  What restraint.  Lashing out would have probably been the typical reaction.  What a lesson this man has taught his family and now all of us.  Here is a TIP FROM A MAN... when something happens that bothers us, let's not only do the old "count to 10" thing but let's search to see if there is a way to respond that is positive and impactful.  A way to lift and elevate all involved.  There just may be.

Enjoy life!

EMPIRE APPLE

 

We all love a good apple.  But there are so many varieties.  Which variety do you like best?  For me and my family this is easy.  We crave the Empire apple.  Empire apples are red, juicy, firm, crunchy and sweet. They ripen during September and October, and will keep until January.  Sometimes Empire apples are hard to find.  But keep trying as they are worth the effort.

This past week for breakfast I enjoyed the following creation:
Oatmeal
Walnuts
Raspberries
Sliced banana
An entire sliced Empire apple
Agave Nectar
Skim Milk

My oh my, this was one of the best TIPS FROM A MAN breakfasts ever.  You can eat right, all the while making it fun, interesting and tasty.  Hopefully you live where you can find the Empire apple.  You will be so happy that you made the effort.

Enjoy life.

THE GOOD FIGHT

Natalie Reed 1957 - 2013

In early 2013 I posted about an event I called Outpouring of Love.  My cousin, a renowned musician and teacher who I love dearly had been diagnosed with stage 4 ovarian cancer.  Within just a few days of this discovery a huge fundraiser featuring famous musicians was organized and attended to capacity with the proceeds going to help Natalie receive treatment.

Well a couple of weeks ago, Natalie lost her battle with cancer after putting up The Good Fight.  So much was learned over these past months.  Natalie taught us how to be graceful when faced with adversity.  Her frequent Facebook posts were remarkable.  So filled with hope and cheer.  In the midst of tremendous pain and suffering, she found a way to reach out and lift others.  On the other hand, Natalie was reminded what unconditional love means.  My oh my how she was served.  Numerous people came forward with open arms to love her without expecting anything in return.  Truly the human spirit at its best.  This generosity and these unsolicited acts of kindness profoundly touched Natalie.

Here is a TIP FROM A MAN... give love away unconditionally.  Don't wait.  Don't hold back.  Don't over think it.  Embrace those around you.  Speak kind words.  Provide a meal or a listening ear.  Be aware of the needs of others.  I truly believe that we are happiest when we lose ourselves in the service of others.  Not exactly the message the world shouts at us, but again, we march to our own drum, now don't we?

Enjoy life!

ANOTHER CHAMPIONSHIP

Brew Crew 2013 League Champions

Well we did it again.  The Brew Crew riding high on a twelve game winning streak, swept our way through the playoffs winning the final game 8 - 2 to capture the championship of the 18+ division of the Utah Adult Baseball League.  This one was not easy.  At the beginning of the season we had to send texts late into the night just to be sure that we would have the required nine players for the game.  We had a couple of key guys pull out because of work/school/family conflicts.  Understandable.  However, by the middle of the season our core group was secure and we found top notch talent as fill in players when needed.  And here we go - another CHAMPIONSHIP!

I wasn't sure that this season was actually going to happen for me.  I was so happy when my knee came around and I was able to again do what I've done for so many seasons.  Remember, there is no way I am going to hold any team back.  So here in this photo are my guys.  All great men.  Hunter, Goose, Kyle, Craig, CJ, Adam, CJ and Neil (yes we had two CJ's).  Missing from the photo are great guys who are also great players such as Brian, Brock, Chris, Jace, Brett, Jacob, Seth, Aaron and Craig.  So many guys play a role in winning a championship.

We were able to arrange for the championship game to be played at the Utah Valley University Ball Park used by the Division I Wolverines and shared by the Orem Owlz, a minor league affiliate of the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim.  It gave the final game a sense of importance.  It gave the family and friends who came to watch a great venue on an amazing sun drenched fall day.  

So what's next?  I am headed to Phoenix at the end of the month to play in a tournament.  This year I am playing in the 35+ wood bat division.  Should be very competitive baseball and a lot of fun.  A great way to end a season that began in Las Vegas way back in March.  Then, back to the gym to prepare for next season.  If I can avoid the injuries I should be able to keep going strong.

Here is a restated TIP FROM A MAN... what is your baseball?  What keeps you young?  What keeps you focused?  What challenges you?  What are you passionate about?  Whatever it is, keep doing it, or find it and do it.  Baseball is what keeps me working out and watching what I eat.  How can you lift weights all winter without a goal?  These young guys show no mercy on the ball field.  The pitchers come in with the heat high tight then come right back with a nasty curve or slide piece.  You've got to run the bases and field your position.  Here are your choices, hold your own or find another sand box to play in.  Well, I'm not quite ready to go look for another sand box.  Hopefully you aren't either.  

Oh, and rest assured, the Brew Crew will be back next season, hungry for another championship.

Enjoy life!

THANK YOU COACH

Many stories we hear today are about coaches that bend the rules or look the other way in order to win.  Also, we hear about parents who go off on coaches, teachers and administrators because little Johnny can do no wrong.  Here is a story of a coach, school administration and parents who see the bigger picture and who have come together with the common purpose of shaping 80 boys into responsible men.

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ROOSEVELT — Matt Labrum believes football helps create great men.

And it is that belief and his passion for the game that led the Union High School head football coach and his staff to suspend all 80 players from the team because of off-field problems ranging from cyberbullying to skipping classes.

“We felt like everything was going in a direction that we didn’t want our young men going,” said Labrum, an alumnus of the program he’s coached for the past two years. “We felt like we needed to make a stand.”

So the coach and his staff gathered the team together after Friday night's loss to Judge Memorial Catholic High School and told them he was concerned about some of the players' actions and behavior off the field. He then instructed them all to turn in their jerseys and their equipment. There would be no football until they earned the privilege to play.

Jenn Rook, whose son Karter is a sophomore on the team, was waiting outside the school that night.  "They were in the locker room for a really long time,” she said. “They came out, and there were tears. Those boys were wrecked. My son got in the car really upset and (said), ‘First of all, there is no football team. It’s been disbanded.’”

Junior Jordan Gurr said he, too, was shocked.  “When they said we’re going to turn our jerseys in, I thought, ‘Oh, I’ve never been cut.’ I figured we’d just been cut. There were no more games. I was sad,” he said.  The coaches told them there would be a 7 a.m. meeting the next day where they would have an opportunity to re-earn a spot on the team.

“We looked at it as a chance to say, ‘Hey, we need to focus on some other things that are more important than winning a football game,” Labrum said. “We got an emotional response from the boys. I think it really meant something to them, which was nice to see that it does mean something. There was none of them that fought us on it.”

Cyberbullying
One incident in particular moved the coaches to action. A few days before, guidance counselors informed the coaches about a student who believed he was being harassed and bullied by football players on an anonymous online chat program called ask.fm — something Labrum and his staff had never heard of before last week. Because the social media website allows users to hurl insults from behind a screen name, there was no way for coaches or counselors to know who was harassing the young man, who is not a member of the football team.

“We said, ‘We’ve got to make a change,’” said Labrum, who met with the student who was bullied on Monday to offer an apology. “We were pretty open with (the players) about what we’d heard. We don’t want that represented in our program. … Whoever it is (doing the bullying), we want to help get them back on the right path.”

But there were other issues that concerned the coaches, including failing and skipping classes and showing disrespect to teachers.

“It had gotten to a new level,” said Labrum. “We felt like we weren’t respecting the teachers, what they were trying to do inside the school, other people’s time. Overall, our program wasn’t going where we wanted it to go. We weren’t reaching the young men like we wanted to reach them.”  So they stopped playing football and started discussing character.

Union character
“I think football molds character,” Labrum said. “We want to help our parents raise their sons. We want to be a positive influence. We want to be an asset.”

During Saturday's team meeting, Labrum gave the suspended players a letter titled "Union Football Character," explaining exactly what the boys would need to do if they wanted to earn their jerseys back.  "The lack of character we are showing off the field is outshining what we are achieving on the field," the letter said. "It is a privilege to play this wonderful game! We must earn the opportunity to have the honor to put on our high school jerseys each Thursday and Friday night!"

Instead of practicing during the days leading up to a homecoming game against Emery High this Friday, they were told to perform community service, and attend study hall and a class on character development. They were also required to perform service for their own families and write a report about their actions.  The players were told they also need to show up on time and attend all of their classes. And those with bad grades were told they must show improvement if they wanted to play.

School administrators who learned of the decision to suspend the team the day before it happened, said they supported the move and saw it as more of an opportunity than punishment.

"As I thought about it, I've got 100 percent confidence in our (coaching) staff," said Principal Rick Nielsen. "They are just excellent men. Sometimes we do think we're bigger than the game."

Parental support
No parent complained about the decision to the administration. Most expressed support and gratitude.
Jenn Rook admits that her first reaction to the suspensions was to hurry off to find a coach to corner, but then her son told her about what led to the decision.

“OK, that’s not so bad then,” Rook said. “I do support it. These boys are not going to be hurt by this. It’s a good life lesson. … It’s not a punishment. I see it as an opportunity to do some good in the community.”
Like Rook, Jeremy Libberton was initially concerned when his son Jaden, a junior, told him what happened.
“I thought, ‘Why is this a team-type issue when there should be individuals that should be held accountable?” Libberton said. “But then I talked to several other parents, and there is really not a way to track this to specific people. I wish we could in this case.”  He talked with Labrum Saturday.

“After I met with him, he’s got my support,” said Libberton. “I’m encouraging my boy to stand strong, to stand with the team and get through it. … If there is not unity with me and the coach, then I become part of the problem.”

Better people
Of the seven team captains elected at the beginning of the season, only two were re-elected after Saturday’s team meeting. Gurr was one of them. He said he is a naturally quiet person, but now understands the need to speak up when he sees questionable behavior.

“I’m a pretty silent person, so I didn’t really say much,” he said, acknowledging that it's difficult to confront your friends when they're out of line. “We’d talk to them after practice sometimes; we’d run. It didn’t work out very well.”

He sees his role as team captain much differently this week than he did during the first two months of the season.  “It gives me a second chance,” Gurr said.

Junior quarterback Tye Winterton said he believes the break from football will make them better players — and better people.  “I definitely didn’t want to turn in my jersey,” said Winterton, who is an honors student. “I love playing. But I trust the coaches and believe in what they’re doing.”

Football to most of the young men is the one thing they look forward to all day.

“It’s probably one of my most favorite things to do,” said Winterton, who also plays soccer and basketball for Union. “I was aware of some things that were going on. … I’d never heard of (ask.fm) until coaches said it.”

Senior running back Gavin Nielsen said he had an ask.fm account but shut it down because he decided it was a waste of time. He also noticed that some of his teammates were skipping classes and struggling in school, but he didn’t always say something.

“One of my weaknesses that I wrote down,” he said, referring to an exercise the players engaged in during Monday's character class, “was that I wasn’t holding people accountable on the field and off the field. As a leader, on the field and off I have to hold people accountable.”

His passion for football hasn’t diminished, but Nielsen said he does have a new perspective on what it means to wear the Union High uniform.

“I still have the love for it and everything,” he said Monday while leaning on a shovel he was using to remove weeds as part of his community service. “But it helped me realize, it’s not all about football.”

By Amy Donaldson, Deseret News

Published: Tuesday, Sept. 24 2013 4:30 p.m. MDT

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Here is a TIP FROM A MAN... stand up and be counted.  Let's focus on the collective good not just our own special interests.  The world needs strong moral leadership.  This is a great example of that.

Enjoy life!

MARRIAGE ADVICE

Typically, the TIPS come from me.  However, when I learn something from someone else, I am eager to share that information as well.  The following is an incredible post from geraldrogers.com.  Hopefully something you read in this post will help you protect the one thing we all should cherish most... love.

MARRIAGE ADVICE I WISH I WOULD HAVE HAD:

Obviously, I’m not a relationship expert. But there’s something about going through divorce that gives you perspective of things you wish you would have done different… After losing a woman that I loved, and a marriage of almost 16 years, here’s the advice I wish I would have had…

1) Never stop courting. Never stop dating. NEVER EVER take that woman for granted. When you asked her to marry you, you promised to be that man that would OWN HER HEART and to fiercely protect it. This is the most important and sacred treasure you will ever be entrusted with. SHE CHOSE YOU. Never forget that, and NEVER GET LAZY in your love.

2) PROTECT YOUR OWN HEART. Just as you committed to being the protector of her heart, you must guard your own with the same vigilance. Love yourself fully, love the world openly, but there is a special place in your heart where no one must enter except for your wife. Keep that space always ready to receive her and invite her in, and refuse to let anyone or anything else enter there.

3) FALL IN LOVE OVER and OVER and OVER again. You will constantly change. You’re not the same people you were when you got married, and in five years you will not be the same person you are today. Change will come, and in that you have to re-choose each other everyday. SHE DOESN’T HAVE TO STAY WITH YOU, and if you don’t take care of her heart, she may give that heart to someone else. Always fight to win her love just as you did when you were courting her.

4) ALWAYS SEE THE BEST in her. Focus only on what you love. What you focus on will expand. If you focus on what bugs you, all you will see is reasons to be bugged. If you focus on what you love, you can’t help but be consumed by love. Focus to the point where you can no longer see anything but love.

5) IT’S NOT YOUR JOB TO CHANGE OR FIX HER… your job is to love her as she is with no expectation of her ever changing. And if she changes, love what she becomes, whether it’s what you wanted or not.

6) TAKE FULL ACCOUNTABILITY for your own emotions: It’s not your wife’s job to make you happy, and she CAN’T make you sad. You are responsible for finding your own happiness, and through that your joy will spill over into your relationship and your love.

7) NEVER BLAME your wife If you get frustrated or angry, it is only because it is triggering something inside of YOU. When you feel those feelings take time to get present and to look within and understand what it is inside of YOU that is asking to be healed. You were attracted to this woman because she was the person best suited to trigger all of your childhood wounds in the most painful way so that you could heal them… when you heal yourself, you will no longer be triggered by her, and you will wonder why you ever were.

8) Allow your woman to JUST BE. When she’s sad or upset, it’s not your job to fix it, it’s your job to HOLD HER and let her know it’s ok. Let her know that you hear her, and that she’s important and that you are that pillar on which she can always lean. The feminine spirit is about change and emotion and like a storm her emotions will roll in and out, and as you remain strong and unjudging she will trust you and open her soul to you… DON’T RUN-AWAY WHEN SHE’S UPSET. Stand present and strong and let her know you aren’t going anywhere. Listen to what she is really saying behind the words and emotion.

9) BE SILLY… don’t take yourself so damn seriously. Laugh. And make her laugh. Laughter makes everything else easier.

10) FILL HER SOUL EVERYDAY… learn her love languages and the specific ways that she feels important and validated and CHERISHED. Ask her to create a list of 10 THINGS that make her feel loved and memorize those things and make it a priority everyday to make her feel loved.

11) BE PRESENT. Give her not only your time, but your focus, your attention and your soul. Do whatever it takes to clear your head so that when you are with her you are fully WITH HER. Treat her as you would your most valuable client. She is.

12) BE WILLING TO TAKE HER SEXUALLY, to carry her away in the power of your masculine presence, to consume her and devour her with your strength, and to penetrate her to the deepest levels of her soul. Let her melt into her feminine softness as she knows she can trust you fully.

13) DON’T BE AN IDIOT…. And don’t be afraid of being one either. You will make mistakes and so will she. Try not to make too big of mistakes, and learn from the ones you do make. You’re not supposed to be perfect, just try to not be too stupid.

14) GIVE HER SPACE… The woman is so good at giving and giving, and sometimes she will need to be reminded to take time to nurture herself. Sometimes she will need to fly from your branches to go and find what feeds her soul, and if you give her that space she will come back with new songs to sing…. (okay, getting a little too poetic here, but you get the point. Tell her to take time for herself, ESPECIALLY after you have kids. She needs that space to renew and get re-centered.)

15) BE VULNERABLE… you don’t have to have it all together. Be willing to share your fear and feelings, and quick to acknowledge your mistakes.

16) BE FULLY TRANSPARENT. If you want to have trust you must be willing to share EVERYTHING… Especially those things you don’t want to share. It takes courage to fully love, and part of that courage is allowing her to love your darkness as well as your light. DROP THE MASK… If you feel like you need to wear a mask around her, and show up perfect all the time, you will never experience the full dimension of what love can be.

17) NEVER STOP GROWING TOGETHER… The stagnant pond breeds malaria, the flowing stream is always fresh and cool. Atrophy is the natural process when you stop working a muscle, just as it is for a relationship that isn’t focused on growing. Find common goals, dreams and visions to work towards.

18) DON’T WORRY ABOUT MONEY. Money is a game, find ways to work together as a team to win it. It never helps when teammates fight. Figure out ways to leverage both persons strength to win.

19) FORGIVE IMMEDIATELY and focus on the future rather than carrying weight from the past. Don’t let your history hold you hostage. Holding onto past mistakes that either you or she makes, is like a heavy anchor to your marriage and will hold you back. Forgiveness is freedom. Cut the anchor loose and always choose love.

20) ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE. ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE. ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE. In the end, this is the only advice you need. If this is the guiding principle through which all your choices is governed, there is nothing that will threaten the happiness of your marriage. Love will always endure.
In the end MARRIAGE isn’t about Happily ever after. It’s about work. And a commitment to grow together and a willingness to continually invest in creating something that can endure eternity. Through that work, the happiness will come.

These are lessons I learned the hard way. These are lessons I learned too late.
But these are lessons I am learning and committed in carrying forward. Truth is, I LOVED being married, and in time, I will get married again, and when I do, I will build it with a foundation that will endure any storm and any amount of time.

MEN- THIS IS YOUR CHARGE : Commit to being an EPIC LOVER. There is no greater challenge, and no greater prize. Your woman deserves that from you.

Be the type of husband your wife can’t help but brag about.
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Nothing I can think to add to this... so this TIP FROM A MAN is to print out this advice, re-read it often and act on what you have read!

Enjoy life.

SOCIAL MEDIA

 

We all need advice when it comes to social media.  Anyone disagree?  Below is a letter written to young ladies from a very wise mom.  It can be found on the blog givenbreath.com.  I hope that this provides you with some positive food for thought and conversation within your family as you use social media and as you work to raise a family.

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Dear girls,
I have some information that might interest you. Last night, as we sometimes do, our family sat around the dining-room table and looked through the summer’s social media photos.
We have teenage sons, and so naturally there are quite a few pictures of you lovely ladies to wade through. Wow – you sure took a bunch of selfies in your skimpy pj’s this summer! Your bedrooms are so cute! Our eight-year-old daughter brought this to our attention, because with three older brothers who have rooms that smell like stinky cheese, she notices girly details like that.
I think the boys notice other things. For one, it appears that you are not wearing a bra.
I get it – you’re in your room, so you’re heading to bed, right? But then I can’t help but notice the red carpet pose, the extra-arched back, and the sultry pout. What’s up? None of these positions is one I naturally assume before sleep, this I know.
So, here’s the bit that I think is important for you to realize. If you are friends with a Hall boy on Facebook or Instagram or Twitter, then you are friends with the whole Hall family.
Please know that we genuinely like staying connected with you this way! We enjoy seeing things through your unique and colorful lens – you are funny, insightful, and often very wise.
Which is what makes your latest self-portrait so extremely unfortunate.
That post doesn’t reflect who you are at all! We think you are lovely and interesting, and usually very smart. But, we had to cringe and wonder what you were trying to do? Who are you trying to reach? What are you trying to say?
And now – big bummer – we have to block your posts. Because, the reason we have these (sometimes awkward) family conversations around the table is that we care about our sons, just as we know your parents care about you.
I know your family would not be thrilled at the thought of my teenage boys seeing you only in your towel. Did you know that once a male sees you in a state of undress, he can’t quickly un-see it? You don’t want our boys to only think of you only in this sexual way, do you?
Neither do we. We’re all more than that.
And so, in our house, there are no second chances with pics like that, ladies. We have a zero tolerance policy. I know, so lame. But if you want to stay friendly with our sons online, you’ll have to keep your clothes on, and your posts decent. If you post a sexual selfie (we all know the one), or link to an inappropriate YouTube video – even once – it’s curtains.
I know that sounds so old school! But we are hoping to raise men with a strong moral compass, and men of integrity don’t linger over pictures of scantily clad high-school girls.
Every day I pray for the women my boys will love. I hope they will be drawn to real beauties, the kind of women who will leave them better people in the end. I also pray that my sons will be worthy of this kind of woman, that they will be patient – and act honorably – while they wait for her.
I realize we have some work still to do in other areas …
Girls, it’s not too late! If you think you’ve made an on-line mistake (we all do – don’t fret – I’ve made some doozies – even today!), RUN to your accounts and take down the closed-door bedroom selfies that makes it too easy for friends to see you in only one dimension.
Will you trust me? There are boys out there waiting and hoping for women of character. Some young men are fighting the daily uphill battle to keep their minds pure, and their thoughts praiseworthy – just like you – so hang in there.
You are growing into a real beauty, inside and out.
Act like her, speak like her, post like her.
I’m glad we’re friends.
Mrs. Hall
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Here is a TIP FROM A MAN... if you are a parent, it IS your business to know what your children are up to.  Be open with them.  Be honest with them.  Let them know that you are on their side.  Communication is the key.  If you don't have children, be wise.  Enough said.

Enjoy life!

PEACHES AND FAMILY

As parents we are always looking for ways to spend quality time with our children.  So imagine how happy I was when I came home from work a few days ago to see this view.  My wife and youngest daughter had spent the afternoon picking peaches from our tree and preserving them in bottles for our use and enjoyment this winter.  This is so amazing on many fronts.  First, my wife and daughter spent hours together chatting and laughing while working together toward a common goal.  What fun for them.  Second, this service will bless not only them but everyone lucky enough to be at our table when one of these bottles is opened up.  Third, they have provided a very healthy food.  As you might know, sugar is used when fruit is canned or preserved in this way.  In an effort to follow the TIPS FROM A MAN guidelines, they used honey along with sugar in an effort to make this final product more healthy.

Well, we just couldn't hold out until the snows of February to try the peaches so we opened a bottle to go along with dinner last Sunday.  The peaches were amazing!  Yummmy!  You could taste the honey.  Here is a TIP FROM A MAN... whenever you can, double up by spending time with your children while storing away good food for future use.  If you have not tried to preserve fruit before, maybe it is time you learned how to do it.  When I was growing up on the ranch, my mother was an expert at stuff like this.  We hardly ever went to the grocery store.  We raised beef.  We raised pigs.  We hunted deer and elk.  We caught fish.  We had chickens for eggs and cows for milk.  We grew a huge garden.  We'd pick berries from trees.  We didn't live where we could grow fruit so we would make trips to Utah to buy fruit then Mother would spend hours preserving fruit and making jams and jellies for use in the long winter months ahead.  This is how we fed our family.  I've never forgotten these valuable lessons.  It is good to be as self sufficient as we can be.  Even though we live in a Quick Serve world, we can bless ourselves and others by learning skills such as this.  And, have a great time doing it.

Enjoy life!

PEACHES AND FRIENDS

Today my wife invited a few friends to join the peaches at our dinner table.  These friends included:

- Banana

- Blueberry

- and Raspberry

OK, how could it get any more simple than this?  But really it is amazing how wonderfully this side dish of fresh fruit went with the dinner.  You know that every bit of this fruit was gone when the meal was over.

Here is a TIP FROM A MAN... eat more fresh fruit.  Eat some for breakfast with cereal or in a smoothie.  Take an apple or banana as a mid-morning snack. And on and on throughout the day.  If you can grow some of your own fruit - all the better.

Which brings me to a bonus topic.  If you grow fruit, trade with a neighbor.  We have been taking some of our peaches to a neighbor who in return is giving us fresh amazingly juicy plums.  How can you beat this arrangement.

So be smart and feed that body of yours correctly so that it will serve you well.  You need energy.  You need tasty stuff.  You don't need extra pounds.  It can be done.  It isn't hard.  And, you can do it.  Believe me, if I can do it, anyone can!

Enjoy life!

PEACHES & ICE CREAM

Alright, you caught me.  I know that ice cream is typically not found within the TIPS FROM A MAN eating guidelines, but every once in a while, I think it is OK to treat yourself if you do it occasionally and in moderation.  Remember, it is all about the calories.  If you take it easy on the portion size, go ahead and have an occasional dessert.

Which brings me to the latest amazing treat we had with our fresh peaches.  How simple can it be... Fresh peaches and vanilla ice cream.  Oh my, it was so good.  It was Dreyer's Slow Churned ice cream with half the fat and 1/3 fewer calories (so claims the packaging).  It sure didn't taste like it was reduced anything.  Very tasty!

Enjoy life.

PEACH WEEK

We have all heard about Shark Week on TV.  Well, I can't think of anything to do with sharks that fits the TIPS FROM A MAN blog (other than it is probably a good idea to avoid them) but I got to thinking, how about we have a peach week?  Since our peach tree is now producing sweet ripe peaches, let's try to come up with creative ways to enjoy peaches.  

Here is a combination that became a quick, tasty and nutritious breakfast:

- Grape Nuts Cereal
- Agave Sweetener
- 1% Milk (yes actual milk from a cow, not almonds, etc.)
- Fresh Peaches

There must be countless ways to use peaches.  My wife and I have already discussed this.  We are going to do all we can to eat them when they are ripe and to preserve them for use at a later time.  Our goal is not to waste a single peach.  Here is a TIP FROM A MAN... grow whatever food you can given your living circumstances.  It is so fun to know that you produced something healthy for yourself and your family.  Growing your own fruits and vegetables can also save a good amount of money.  Give it a try if you aren't doing something now.  Start small by growing a couple of tomato plants or some lettuce or by planting a fruit tree.  Figure out what you can do indoors if you live in an apartment.  You might just find out that you have a green thumb after all!

Enjoy life.

FRESH PEACH PROTEIN SHAKE

This morning I was hungry and needed something to get me fired up.  When I was doing my Friday duty of taking the trash to the curb my eyes fell upon our peach tree.  Our peach tree is loaded this year so much so that the branches are hanging awkwardly.  I thought that the peaches wouldn't yet be ripe, but out of curiosity (or beastly hunger) I decided to go to the tree and give a few peaches a little squeeze.  I was right, the majority of the peaches were still hard... but after a minute I found one that was soft.  BAM!!  Success!

So, I plucked that juicy peach from the tree and sprinted into the house to create the amazing drink that you see pictured above.  Here are the ingredients:

- Fresh Peach

- Fresh Blueberries

- Walnuts

- Protein Powder

- Ice Cubes

- Coconut Water (8 oz.)

After a few seconds in the Magic Bullet Blender I was wildly gulping this cool, refreshing, delicious protein shake.  It was so tasty.  Here is A TIP FROM A MAN... make every meal an adventure.  Be excited about healthy food.  Be creative.  Never allow yourself to be lazy when it comes to nutrition.  Your body needs you to take care of it so it can perform for you.

This morning was a treat.  When I got out of bed, I didn't know that I was about to feast on a fresh home grown peach.  Find joy the little unexpected surprises of life.  They are everywhere if you look for them.

Enjoy life!

STICKING WITH IT

Tim Doing What He Does

It is easy to get fired up about something then flame out.  Have you done this?  Perhaps you decided that you were going to learn to play the guitar so you went out and dropped some bucks on a nice acoustical six string, bought some music, took some lessons, then realized a few months later that you hadn't been practicing and that you seem to always to have other things to do.

This probably happens most frequently with exercise and diet.  The old "new years resolution" thing.  Well, I just got a message from Tim that you might be interested in reading.  Tim has been following the TIPS FROM A MAN blog from almost the beginning.  He has been good enough to stay in touch and to share his experiences.  He updated us on 6/18/2012 and again on 9/29/12.  At one point he had lost a total of 41.5 lbs following the TIPS FROM A MAN guidelines.  I really enjoy his honesty.

Tim writes...

Roger,

I wanted to provide you with an update as to this years activities and progress.  After all the amazing success I had last year, I must admit I "fell off the wagon" a bit over the winter.  I gained 15-20 pounds.  In early spring of this year, I paused and reflected a bit on where I was when I was hiking once or twice a week and where I found myself after a season of inactivity.  I was never discouraged because I knew from  "Tips From a Man" what small changes I could again make that over time would restore my level of fitness and stamina.  Further reflection disclosed some interesting things.  First of all, I have a passion for hiking.  When the snow fell and I could no longer access the trails I was accustomed to hiking (or so I thought) I was at a loss as to how to remain active (I hate the treadmill).  Over the winter, a post on your blog dealt with snowshoeing and a light bulb went off.  Snowshoeing in the winter!!  I think I could really enjoy that and I have heard it is quite a work out.  Additionally, I could access some of the lower trails that I love.  Problem solved!

As for my current state, I am back to where I was (actually a little ahead of the game) and hiking regularly.  I am hiking lengthy trails that I did not hike last year and having a great time.  All of a sudden I have 10-12 people that want to summit Timpanogos with me this year and we have scheduled a hike for a few weeks from now.  I have already been to the basin and will probably hike to the bomber crash site then over to Emerald Lake this Saturday.  

By the way, when I visited my cardiologist this spring, my numbers were still good with the exception of the good cholesterol.  His recommendation to raise the good cholesterol . . . physical activity.  Another problem solved!

Thank you again for your blog and keep up the great work.  So many good ideas. You rock!

____________________

Yes, like all of us, Tim proved that he is human.  But I am so inspired at how he learned from his experiences and how he has figured out how to have a more healthy and enjoyable winter so he can be consistent with his goals all year round.  That is what it is all about.  Here is a TIP FROM A MAN... seek for solutions.  Let's don't just talk about our problems.  Let's not be a complainer.  Let's change our circumstances and our problems.  I'm hopeful that in a few months we will see a photo of Tim snowshoeing over a breathtaking mountain peak with a big grin on his face.  You Go Tim!  And, You Go to all of us!

Enjoy life!

 

FOOD TRUCK

There is a craze sweeping the country called the food truck.  This is by no means a new idea, but it sure is receiving renewed popularity.  These trucks are typically run by local entrepreneurs that sell tasty food creations often prepared right before your very eyes.  As you know this blog is about healthy living and enjoying life.  Not everything you are about to see is 100% TIPS FROM A MAN approved!  But occasionally, if you go light on the portion size, you can enjoy these amazing tasty delights.

 ROCCO'S

 Beef Taco

 Fish Tacos

Wings and Fries

Rocco's is located at 1 E Center Street in Provo Utah.  CJ the owner is a great guy, is knowledgeable on about any topic (especially baseball) but unfortunately will likely not have time to chat as he will be busy preparing your food!  Their specialties are tacos (fish, beef and chicken), and wings (too many flavors to list).  They have fries that looked amazing but I did not try them.  Also on the menu is frozen lemonade.  In the winter months Rocco's is famous for their healthy hearty homemade soups. And in the first photo did you notice the huge speakers?  The music is delightful kind of a Reggae... Bob Marley... Island hip mix that was very fun.  Not too loud... not to soft.  Prices: Tacos range from $1.50 - $2.00 each.  Wings were $6.99 for an order.  Pretty sweet.

I love to encourage people to try the local fare when possible.  Rocco's is a gem.  The tacos were delicious!  Here is a TIP FROM A MAN... when you splurge, do so carefully!  Manage the calorie count so that you don't take a beat down from your waistline!

Enjoy life.

CHERRY BREAKFAST

Summer.  Love it!  Check out this breakfast.  The star of this meal is the fresh cherries that I picked earlier that morning from our tree.  Whenever possible a TIP FROM A MAN is to buy fresh and to buy local.  If you are fortunate enough to grow some food yourself, all the better!

Allow me to provide the run down on this tasty and filling breakfast: Granola cereal, fresh sliced banana, dried plums (from Costco) and a bunch of pitted cherries sliced in half.  I forgot to include this in the photo, but I topped this with a splash of almond milk.

Trust me, this meal was tasty and very filling and satisfying.  I usually eat a mid morning snack but on this day I didn't feel like one and wasn't all that interested in lunch.  The texture and variety of this meal was very interesting.

Here is a TIP FROM A MAN... don't allow yourself to get bored with food.  Be a bit creative.  Take a few chances.  You can eat wisely and make it fun, easy, affordable and tasty all at the same time.  You can have it all.  You better believe it!

Enjoy life.

PERSEVERANCE

We hear it all the time... "stick with it"... "keep going"... "don't give up"...  Well as we all know, sometimes it is easier said than done.  But there is so much truth to this.  Look at how many inventions came out of failure.  Consider the great leaders in our nations history who lost first elections.  How many great athletes were cut from a team once or twice or more?  What if they didn't "keep after it?"

As I have discussed before, I hurt my knee in October 2012.  I really didn't think I did anything to it.  I had hurt it before requiring two surgeries but this just didn't seem like that big of a deal.  I was hoping that it would get better in a couple of weeks, but that turned out to be wishful thinking.  Then I was shooting for March when the first baseball tournaments started rolling around.  No.  OK, well then I got an MRI, kept seeing an amazing chiropractor and started to play in a baseball season with a knee brace.  It was humbling.  It hurt to walk let alone run.  I found out how difficult it is to have your normal bat swing when you don't have your legs under you.  I kept stretching and lifting.  Pretty much decided that I was going to have to live with it, but that I was just going to keep playing.  Then an amazing thing happened.  I realized about two weeks ago (almost 8 months after the injury) that I wasn't babying my knee so much any more.  It wasn't bothering me when I took a swing.  Then I went back and looked at my batting stats for the past two weeks (4 games in both the 40+ league and with the young guys 18+) and was stunned.  Over that period I had gone 11 for 16 for a .688 batting average.  And I also realized that I have been getting to balls in the outfield just like in years past.

Now I know that playing adult baseball isn't all that important in the grand scheme of things, but there might be a lesson here.  Here is a TIP FROM A MAN... let's all consider taking this same approach to things that do matter in life.  With our families, in our churches, in our jobs, in our communities, with our health.  Don't give up when faced with a set back.  Keep a level head.  Stay motivated.  Keep working.  Visualize what you are working for.  Try and try again.  Patch it up with that son, daughter or spouse.  Be a voice of reason.  Work a few extra hours.  Be more kind and respectful.  Battle that illness.  Be more creative.  Stick with eating right and exercising.  Believe that you can make a difference... better yet, know that you can make a difference.

Enjoy life!

ROONEYISIMS

Is there anyone that remembers Andy Rooney that didn't appreciate his perspective?  I didn't always watch the entire 60 Minutes weekly broadcast, but I remember doing all that I could not to miss the end of the show when Andy Rooney took a few minutes to share his view about a particular subject. Another one of my favorite men from the past was Paul Harvey.  Don't be surprised if a tid bit or two from the files of Paul Harvey make its way into a future TIPS FROM A MAN blog post.  As you well know, the purpose of this blog is to help each of us be a bit more wise and live life a little bit more completely.  The following wisdom from Andy Rooney is priceless:

Rooneyisims:

This little piece could well serve to honor one whose last few years evidenced great wisdom, though, at the same time

he became something of an ornery old dude.

If you will take the time to read these. I promise you'll come away with an enlightened perspective.

The subjects covered affect us all on a daily basis: 

They're written by Andy Rooney , a man who has the gift of saying so much with so few words.

Enjoy....... 

I've learned.... That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person. 

I've learned.... That when you're in love, it shows. 

I've learned.... That just one person saying to me, 'You've made my day!' makes my day.

I've learned.... That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

I've learned.... That being kind is more important than being right.

I've learned.... That you should never say no to a gift from a child. 

I've learned.... That I can always pray for someone when I don't have the strength to help him in some other way. 

I've learned.... That no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with. 

I've learned.... That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand. 

I've learned.... That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.

I've learned.... That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

I've learned.... That we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for.

I've learned.... That money doesn't buy class.

I've learned.... That it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular. 

I've learned.... That under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

I've learned.... That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

I 've learned.... That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.

I've learned.... That love, not time, heals all wounds.

I've learned.... That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.

I've learned.... That everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile..

I've learned.... That no one is perfect until you fall in love with them. 

I've learned... That life is tough, but I'm tougher. 

I've learned.... That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.

I've learned.... That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere. 

I've learned.... That I wish I could have told my Mom that I love her one more time before she passed away. 

I've learned.... That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them. 

I've learned..... That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.

I've learned..... That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you're hooked for life.

I've learned.... That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you're climbing it. 

I've learned.... That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.

Thank goodness for people like Andy Rooney.  Now the real IQ test... will we take to heart these priceless words of wisdom.  Yes, I think we will.

Enjoy life.